Dating Diva

I love the movie, “The Notebook.” I’m a hopeless romantic. I cry at weddings. I cry when my friends get hurt by life’s daily tumbles. I also cry when I watch Marley & Me and the Lion King — every single time.

I’m completely okay with all of this.

It’s what makes me, me. It’s something I’m never going to try and change. I”m comfortable with who I am, my faults included, and maybe it’s my willingness to wear my heart on my sleeve that is my biggest weakness.

Beyond being a caring person, I am also a storyteller. A quirky writer. A creative soul.

I view my world through a lens where I see situations for how they will later play out at the mercy of my pen, or through the unforgiving eye of my video camera, or through code into my Web site. This serves me well as a writer, but not as a sensitive girl.

This is because I view my relationships, regardless of type, through the same lens. But what kills me about this is I am only one character in these stories, just a single character. I can only move myself through them. The others’ future moves are just as mysterious to me as mine are to them. I don’t know the outcome. And in the end, the outcome is left in the other person’s hands – meaning I may never know exactly what will happen until it has already played out. You’ll never know exactly what people will say, do or feel. Even if you think you know all there is to know about someone, they’re still bound to surprise you. Especially when the plot thickens.

I guess to put it bluntly, everyone that we come across is a contributing author to our life story. We can only react to how they act towards us. I guess that’s where the phrase, “life is about the give and take,” came from.

At one point or another, we all wish that we could cheat at our own stories. Maybe flip to the last page to ensure that it will all turn out okay, or skim the words through a difficult time so that we didn’t have to feel and act out every aching, brutal moment of it.

But we can’t. These moments are what make us grown and learn as individuals.

I’m living my own story, but I’m not writing it.

The minor control-freak in me is positively terrified by that statement. I just need to trust that the authors of my story have my best interest in mind for me, also known as a happy ending. Because what I do have control of is what authors I surround myself with. I need to seek out and trust in the goodness of people. And I always need to live out my story, trying to make the right move at all times, regardless of what is thrown at me by others.

Deep breaths. It’s time to trust that it will all end up okay. Believe in all things good in this world. Because if it’s not okay, it’s not the end. And those are absolutely beautiful words to live by.

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For more on Lisa, including fabulous DIY how-to’s, funny confessions and embarrassing realizations, you can check out her personal blog.

Follow Dating Diva’s daily adventures on Twitter: @LisaDiVirgilio

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