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Great Job! You’re Fired.

File this under the “You Can’t Make This Stuff Up” category.

According to Royce Young’s article on, the Miami Heat sales force were fired…for selling out of season tickets.

Don’t clean your ears out. You read that right. (mixed metaphor alert!)

Here’s most of the article…

Typically, if you do your job really, really well, you get a promotion. Or you get a raise. Or at the very least, you get to keep your job.

But that didn’t happen in Miami as the Heat fired its season ticket sales staff after the team sold out of season tickets. Ouch.

In a statement, the team confirmed the terminations Friday afternoon, saying that with an “exhausted” inventory of season-tickets “we no longer require a season ticket sales team to sell tickets.”

Stephen Weber, vice president of sales, delivered the news to about 30 ticket sales people Friday morning, according to the story from the Miami Herald. Currently, the team’s waiting list has more than 6,000 names on it. It’s pretty evident that at this point, the Heat can sell tickets without even trying.

“They let us go because there was really nothing left to do anymore,” a fired staffer told the Herald.

The statement also said: “While the decision to release part of our sales force was a difficult one, we greatly appreciate their contributions to the company. We have also hired a placement service to assist those individuals find new employment. Should any season tickets become available, they will be handled through our season ticket deposit program. We thank those employees for their time with the company and wish them success in their future endeavors.”

Hmmm…I wonder if Minnesota, Atlanta, or New Jersey is looking for help in their season ticket sales department.

On the other hand, what could have been easier than selling those Heat tickets?

Selling bottles of ice cold water in the desert? Life insurance to service men going overseas? Umbrellas in a rain storm? How about sunblock to nudists on a hot beach?

Ok. I’ll stop now.

They actually could have set up a ration or lottery system, I guess. Hired auctioneers instead and made more money.

I once knew a guy who was trying to save his aerospace company save money. He recommended that his company close his office. He thought he would be rewarded by getting moved to another office. They closed that office and he was let go.

Not that same thing but …kind of.

Thomas Halzack

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