Midlife Mom

Navigating the teen years… and beyond

Archive for December, 2012

Carry those lost in your heart

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It’s been a very tough week. Hard to hold what’s supposed to be the joy of the holiday season in your heart.

Today, moments of silence were held not just here in our corner of the earth, where the unspeakable happened a week ago today, but all over the world. There is comfort in knowing so many people are sending their love and support your way. But most of us still can’t comprehend how the families whose loved ones are now gone can get through this.

It’s my hope that we all carry a little bit of each one of those 26 souls in our hearts — their joy of life, their dreams for the future, their selflessness and most of all, their ability to love and to connect with others. That’s been a recurring theme for so many of the people lost in this senseless act — they understood how important it was to connect with others and treat them with kindness, compassion and respect.

Let’s all try to do the same.

We’re all Newtown

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“You are not alone.”
President Obama said those words last night at Newtown High School. He spoke during a moving service meant to start the healing process — a service that paid tribute to the 20 children and six adults who were innocent victims of a gunman’s rampage on Friday at Sandy Hook Elementary School.
And he’s right. We’re all with you. We all grieve for you. We want you to know how much we care. How much we wish we could help. We can’t imagine your pain. Your loss.
All over Fairfield County people are in shock. They’re heartbroken. This kind of thing shouldn’t happen here, in our own backyard. These were young, defenseless children; and brave teachers, administrators and school staff who tried to protect them.
But the President was right. The people of Newtown and the family and friends of those who were slain aren’t alone. An outpouring of sympathy has come not just from your neighbors next door, but from people across the state, the region, the nation and even the world. Candlelight vigils are being held as far away as India, and people everywhere are sending their prayers and messages of support.
No Newtown, you’re not alone. And we hope knowing that brings you some comfort as you make your way through this nightmare.

The beloved (and hated) holiday letter!

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Are you checking items off your holiday to-do list?

I’ve got many tasks to finish before our family spends Christmas away from home for the first time ever. And high up on that list is sending out our holiday greeting cards, which means writing the annual holiday letter.

It’s a subject of controversy, I know. People either love them or hate them. Of course, many of these letters can come across as elitist. We’ve all seen them. “Suzy had yet another year of all A’s, making Honor Society. And we’re so proud that she won first place in All-Around at the state gymnastics competition, which we were afraid she was going to miss after she sprained her wrist while helping victims of Hurricane Sandy dig sand and mud out of their basements. And did we mention, she was accepted to Harvard!”

Please!!

We try very hard NOT to make our letters sound like this (not that our kids have done any or all of those things), but at the same time focus on the good stuff that’s happened in the year since we sent our last holiday letter.

Some years, though, I draw blanks and pass this task to my husband. I think he’s better at summarizing the family’s high points and knowing just what to share with others. And why is that? After all, I lived through the same year with the same people. Why can he remember things I can’t?

Some years I’ve debated nixing the letter. A signed card should be adequate, right? Especially since our kids are grown and it’s no longer necessary to include that cute group photo like when they were little. But then other people’s cards start to roll in, most of which include these family letters and many of which tell me they’re looking forward getting our family update.

So I cave.

Of course, it’s early. We’ve only gotten two holiday cards. But I know they’re coming!

That holiday letter is on this weekend’s to-do list.