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We interrupt the entertainment portion of the high school blog for an important public service announcement:

To all of you junior statisticians, team managers, assistant coaches, parents, fans and, yes, some of you pup reporters out there, there’s a good chance you’re not keeping statistics correctly.

The information you are throwing out to the world might — just might — be tainted. Shocking, I know.

We can help. We can steer you on the right path. We’re here to offer some major points on keeping high school statistics so we can move oh so closer to a football statistical utopia, an idyllic world where love and freedom reign, a world where 1+1 = 2, a world where rushing yardage and passing yardage just feels right.

Imagine such a world. It isn’t hard to do.

You may say I’m a dreamer. But I’m not the only one.

Read this. Some day you’ll join us. And the high school football world will live as one.

The following has been provided by the state’s ultimate statistician, Bob Barton, who’s been doing this longer than most of us have been alive. Methinks he knows what he’s talking about.

Please read carefully. There will be a test.

POINTS OF EMPHASIS on Scholastic Football Offensive Statistics

(adapted from National Federation scoring rule book)

Rush or pass? Any pass that goes forward – i.e. toward the goal line the offense is attacking – from the point where it leaves the passer’s hand(s)  is a forward pass.  Any pass that does not go forward is not a forward pass.  Whether the ball is thrown overhand, underhand, sidearm, one-handed or two-handed makes no difference.  If the pass is dropped or goes out of bounds, the action of the officials (i.e. whether they spot the ball at the previous line of scrimmage) tells you whether it was a forward pass.

SPB sez: So just because a QB throws a ball, doesn’t make it a pass unless it goes forward. If the pass goes sideways or backwards, statistically it’s a run. Hear that? A run.

Sack yardage. A player who is sacked while intending to pass is charged with a rush and negative yardage from the scrimmage line to the point where he is tackled.  What he intended doesn’t count.  A player who fades to pass always has the option of running.

SPB sez: This means that just because a quarterback is taken down behind the line of scrimmage, DOES NOT  mean it’s a sack. A good rule of thumb is if the QB tucks the ball and starts running. And, just to emphasize another point above, this isn’t the NFL. Sack yardage is rush yardage.

Total offense: This statistic is the sum of a player’s net rushing yardage and net passing yardage. It does not include receiving.  It does not include returns of punts, kickoffs, interceptions.

Knees and spikes.  If a quarterback takes the snap and kneels to kill time, do not charge him with a loss but charge a “team” rush for the yardage lost.  If he takes the snap and spikes the ball to save time, do not charge him with a pass but charge a “team” pass attempt.

First downs: A touchdown by the offensive team on a series of downs that originates outside the 10-yard line earns credit for a first down.  A first down awarded because of a penalty earns credit for a first down, regardless of the yardage.  A team may be credited with first downs by rushing (or passing) and by penalty on the same play.

Points after touchdown: Yards gained or lost during a conversion attempt are not credited or charged to any player or his team.  Time is out during the conversion attempt.  If the attempt succeeds, credit the appropriate player or players in the scoring statistics.

Safeties: No individual player is credited with points when his team records a safety.  The player may be credited with a tackle, tackle for loss and/or sack as appropriate.  He may be credited for the safety in the scoring summary for the newspapers, which is not a statistic.

SPB sez: So don’t give players 2 points on MaxPreps for someone scoring a safety.

Laterals and fumbles: A lateral pass play or a fumble advanced by offensive team is treated as an extension of the original play. If a ball carrier laterals after passing the scrimmage line, credit him with yardage to the point where the lateral is received and the recipient with yardage to end end of the play.  A fumble by an offensive player that rolls forward (i.e. toward the opposition’s goal) earns yardage to the point of recovery for the player who fumbled.  If a player fumbles after the ball has crossed the scrimmage line and a teammate recovers and advances it, credit the player who fumbled with yardage to the point of recovery and the player who advances the ball with yardage from the point of recovery to the end of the play.

Example: Montville’s ball on the St. Joseph 34.  M40 rushes to the 32 and fumbles.  The ball bounces to the 22, where M80 recovers and advances it to the 7.  Credit M40 with 12 yards rushing and a fumble; credit M80 with no rush but 15 yards rushing and a fumble recovery.

Example: Masuk ball on the Bunnell 12.  M11 passes to M85, who is hit and fumbles into the end zone, where M90 recovers.  Credit M11 with a completed pass, 12 yards passing and a touchdown pass.  Credit  M85 with a reception and 12 yards receiving.  Credit M90 with no reception and no yards but a touchdown by receiving.

Here’s a very important one, kids. We’ll break it down for you.

Holding. Because certain penalties, such as offensive holding, are enforced from the spot of the foul in high school, charge the actual yardage the penalty costs the team.  Example: Amity’s ball at its 40; lineman A79 retreats to protect the passer and holds at the 34.  The penalty is to the 24.  Charge a 16-yard penalty.

SPB Sez: Again, this isn’t the NFL. Holding penalties and the like are spot fouls, meaning you have to account for yardage gained after the penalty is enforced. So if a player runs from the 20 to the 44-yard line (for a gain of 24 yards), and holding occurs at the 34, the penalty is marked 10 yards back to the 24, the runner must be given a carry and 14 yards to account for the yardage gained before the penalty.