I spent a torturous hour in a car dealership waiting room while my car was being repaired today. The poor magazine I brought had to compete with an elevated widescreen TV that was set at an elevated volume. It blasted the News at us — a 24-hour variety which consisted of chirpy reporters waxing enthusiastic about the most mundane events, interrupted frequently by even more distracting commercials.
Gym Etiquette Part II – The Locker Room
The locker room and showers at the gym are fraught with etiquette issues. The people who come in dripping wet and slop water all over the place ― water which will then get your socks wet when you’re getting dressed. The women who set up a bunch of paper towels on a bench to sit on (naked), and then leave them there. The random tissues and papers lying around (Pick it up? Or run away?).
Mixed Metaphors and Malaprops — Doofus Test!
This is my collection of mixed metaphors and malaprops. See if you can work one of these gems into your conversation or perhaps a memo today. Does it go by unnoticed? This is a doofus test.
Cell Phones: Should They Be Banned in Supermarkets?
At which point a tall, burly, dandruffy, overfed man walked straight into me. I felt like I had been assaulted. He didn’t blink, turn, apologize, or acknowledge it in any way. His eyes were hostile slits, his face impassive.
