This is year is going to be the greatest yet. Huge, wonderful things will unfold in every facet of life. I have always had an uncanny knack for predictions, very specific in nature.
- Life will be discovered on Mars. The evidence won’t come from the rover or NASA, I don’t want to give it away—I promised to remain hush hush about the details until later on in the spring.
- Downtown Westport will continue to be developed. At least one of the new restaurants will fail but the others will do as well as the Spotted Horse.
- The Save The Children building will be sold for 20 million dollars, condos will replace it, they will cost a lot of money—no one will buy them and the property will be repossessed by the bank and rented out for senior housing.
Quatrain # 2
- Obama will land in an Ospry vertical landing jet at Winslow Park to see a performance at the playhouse. Bill Clinton will make the rounds at Splash on a Sunday afternoon in early August—a reggae band will play a Marley tune.
- Mcmansions will be torn down to make way for the new onion crop as drought in other states send the price of onions higher than a troy ounce of gold—pound for pound.
- The Saugatuck River will swell beyond it’s banks and carve a new course by-passing Westport altogether. The dry river bed will be filled in to create the green necklace nature walk.
Quatrain # 4
- The new Levett Pavilion will be so nice that the Rolling Stones will insist on using it as a rehearsal stage everyday for six months, at full volume.
- Kanye West and Kim Kardashian will have a child and move to Westport for the schools. They will film a reality TV special using select Westport locations as a backdrop.
- Sherwood Island will be sold by the state and developed into an international airport for small private jets—Sherwood International.
Quatrain # 5
- Staples High School goes private, I saw this one coming. Those who can’t afford tuition are bussed to Bridgeport schools.
- The members of Saugatuck Church convert to Judaism.
- Parking is banned on Main Street—instead of bricking it over it is turned into a mud track for horse and carriage.
All of this and more await. The master plan has been set in motion for the happiest of new years.